Thank You For Your Service!

 

Veterans hear that a lot nowadays.

We’ll hear it everywhere today – even though Memorial Day isn’t really about us, those veterans still among the living.

Thank you for your service.

As a veteran, and as somebody who has a moderately large social media following and internet footprint, I get asked how I feel about that phrase on a fairly regular basis.

Thank you for your service.

As a veteran who typically wears one of my various ratty old Navy sweatshirts around, I get thanked for my service daily. Alaskan businesses are big on giving out military discounts, both to active duty military personnel and very often to retirees as well (which is damned unusual and which I sincerely appreciate), and so I often flash my retired military ID at the register or maybe the waitress spots it when I pull out my wallet to pay for a meal, and in addition to the discount I get thanked for my service.

Thank you for your service.

Some vets enjoy being thanked for their service.

Many are ambivalent.

Some are irritated or embarrassed or angry at being reminded of things they'd rather forget. And some just plain don't give a damn.

Many are sick of hearing it.

And that’s okay. Each of us deals with our service in our own way.

Thank you for your service.

It often feels hollow, a stock phrase that get tossed about nowadays, all run together like a sound clip on fast-forward: tankewfoyerserviceandhaveaniceday!

Thank you for your service. 

Me? I don't mind.

I take it in the spirit offered, just like the discount.

If it seems sincere, I nod and thank them sincerely in return for their thoughts - and why not?

You know, many folks truly do appreciate the sacrifices and dedication. Many truly do respect those who stand the watch out there in the dark and dangerous corners of the world, day in and day out year after year. They truly do admire their fellow citizens and it makes them proud to know they live in a nation that whatever its flaws and whatever its problems and whatever its divides still produces in boundless quantity men and women of such resolute character that they are willing to voluntarily place their own precious selves between home and war's desolation. 

Some folks thank us because they don't know what else to do, or because they wish they could do more. Because they’re embarrassed that they themselves didn’t serve. Or because they’re embarrassed that our lives are wasted out there in wars and conflicts they vehemently disagree with.

Some of those people? The one who offer up thanks? They're vets too and you can see it in their eyes, the respect.  They say thank you for your service because they know. They know. Because they’ve been out there.  And because they just enjoy talking to another vet and that thanks is a way to open conversation with a stranger, with a brother or sister you just haven’t met yet, in the checkout line.

And so, when they offer up sincere thanks, I sincerely appreciate it in return and why the hell not? 

Just like the discount, I don’t expect it, and I surely don’t demand it as my due, but, you know, I’ll take it in humble gratitude if offered.

A young man recently thanked me for my service. He was 18, maybe 19, working his way through the Alaskan summer, earning money for college as a crewman on a glacier viewing ship I happened to be a passenger on.  He thanked me and he meant it, eyes wide with respect and admiration. He said he was thinking about joining the reserves. I spoke to him for a while as the ship returned to dock, offering up a bit of crusty old Warrant Officer advice - because that's part of it too, paying it back, giving respect back in exchange for respect given, encouraging the next generation.  Agree with how the military and we veterans have been used over the last few decades, or not, you have to stand in admiration and respect for a generation of young people who are still willing to don the uniform and go forth under the Stars and Stripes. They have every reason not to, and yet they still go and that should tell you everything you need to know about them. America will be in good hands when these kids take over, you have only to look around to see it.

Thank you for your service.

Oh sure, sometimes it's tendered reflexively out of America's collective guilt. Guilt at how we treated the previous generation of warriors, the ones that came home from Korea and Vietnam. 

That’s okay, the guilt.

Sincere or not, being reflexively thanked for your service is a damned sight better than being spit on or called a baby killer.

You can tell, when it’s out of guilt. I nod and smile and move on, perfectly willing to accept a belated thanks for my comrades in arms, in the names of the ones that came before me, the ones that are no longer with us and to whom we honor on this Memorial Day.

I accept those guilty thanks, not for me but for them, because that’s what we were trained to do in the military, look out for each other, leave no one behind.

Thank you for your service.

And yes, sometimes it’s just a stock phrase, thankewferurservice.

And so what?

I take it in the spirit offered with a polite stock “thanksapprecitit” in return.  Just like the discount, sincere or not, offered only to get me into the store, whatever, I’ll take it and why the hell not? These people don’t owe me anything. I didn’t serve so America would owe me or give me a military discount.  As a veteran, especially one who served of your own free will, you start thinking that the country should kowtow to you over your service, you’re headed down a dangerous road of resentment. Look around, there is a certain fraction of disgruntled vets who do feel that way and unhappy miserable bastards they are, one and all. If the military taught you anything, it should have taught you that your personal happiness doesn’t depend on anybody else.  You have the respect of your comrades in arms, the ones who know, what else do you need?

Thank you for your service.

Today is about thanking those who fell in the service of their country.

Many of those thanks are heartfelt and sincere. Some of that gratitude is out of guilt, perhaps, or out of duty, or self-serving political agendas. Some is nothing more than simple gratitude for a day off to spend with family and friends for whatever cause.

And that’s okay.

Thanks are not required, in America we revere the warrior no more than any other citizen and that is exactly as it should be.

But if you find the time today, take a moment and raise a glass to those who have fallen in your name. Do it so that they are not forgotten, if only briefly.

And then go on, live your lives, be free, because that’s the best way to honor them.

 

To all of you who have served, the living and the dead, as always, thank you.

- Chief Warrant Officer Jim Wright USN(ret)