My favorite one was the guy who thought he could get away with having a chew in formation - bein' in the back rank and all... He turned to sneak a spit into a hedge and hit the drill right in the boots with a big stream of goo... There was some creative cussin' going on - don't think the drill repeated himself in the 5 minutes or so he was hollering...
I never asked if he swallowed that gob or not - hehheh
Karl, I think I know that guy, or his brother. I swear there's always one idiot who thinks he can sneak a dip in formation.
I knew a guy once who puked all down the front of the XO, during General Quarters. Also once knew a guy who puked off the 04 level, directly onto the Midships Quarter Deck below, directly on top of the OOD's podium (fortunately, the OOD had just stepped away to answer a the phone), missed the American Flag by about two feet. Never a career enhancing move. Just sayin.
Oh, I can see the trajectory on that....fweeeeepshhhhhh....
Ah, the barf stories... There's the one about a guy we called Yarp and a brand new barbecue grill; one involving the battalion commander's van, a laundry bag with new shoes in it, a sunny morning, and a disgruntled battalion sergeant-major with a garden hose; one about 'cleaning fee avoidance' and how tight can you tuck in your shirt...
Well, the guy who puked on the XO was seasick, but he had help.
See, he did get chronically seasick, but he wore a patch (Dramamine), and was ok most of the time. Except on this particular day, somebody, and I'm not saying who, smeared sardines in mustard sauce on the inside of his gas mask. During the GQ, we went to Circle William (gas drills) and donned masks. His eyes got big a saucers, he ripped the mask off, clutched his mouth, and ran for the head - breaking Zebra (water tight integrity) by opening the door in the process. Breaking Zebra is a major bad. The XO happened to be in the passageway and our boy ran right into him. XO started dressing him down, and ulp BARF! right down the front of the XO. Classic. We don't have cable at sea, entertainment is where you find it.
The other guy? That wasn't seasickness, that was too much liberty the night before.
Comments on this blog are moderated. Each will be reviewed before being allowed to post. This may take a while. I don't allow personal attacks, trolling, or obnoxious stupidity. If you post anonymously and hide behind an IP blocker, I'm a lot more likely to consider you a troll. Be sure to read the commenting rulesbefore you start typing. Really.
Screw that, I talk like I have 3 of a kind.
ReplyDeleteO.o
Not a flush or a full house?
ReplyDeletehee - I remember one kid in basic - he actually asked, "A pair of what?"
AH CAIN'T HEER YOO!!!
Every good three of a kind has a little pair to go with it, right? ;)
ReplyDeleteIn the navy
ReplyDeleteYes, you can sail the seven seas
In the navy
Yes, you can put your mind at ease
In the navy....
Oh, wait--that's how you sing "In The Navy." I misunderstood the question.
Yes, you most certainly did. ;)
ReplyDeleteKarl, there's always one in every outfit, ain't there?
ReplyDeleteMy favorite one was the guy who thought he could get away with having a chew in formation - bein' in the back rank and all... He turned to sneak a spit into a hedge and hit the drill right in the boots with a big stream of goo... There was some creative cussin' going on - don't think the drill repeated himself in the 5 minutes or so he was hollering...
ReplyDeleteI never asked if he swallowed that gob or not - hehheh
oh, so our training company had at least 2... We were pretty light by the end of that 16 weeks... :)
ReplyDeleteKarl, I think I know that guy, or his brother. I swear there's always one idiot who thinks he can sneak a dip in formation.
ReplyDeleteI knew a guy once who puked all down the front of the XO, during General Quarters. Also once knew a guy who puked off the 04 level, directly onto the Midships Quarter Deck below, directly on top of the OOD's podium (fortunately, the OOD had just stepped away to answer a the phone), missed the American Flag by about two feet. Never a career enhancing move. Just sayin.
Oh, I can see the trajectory on that....fweeeeepshhhhhh....
ReplyDeleteAh, the barf stories... There's the one about a guy we called Yarp and a brand new barbecue grill; one involving the battalion commander's van, a laundry bag with new shoes in it, a sunny morning, and a disgruntled battalion sergeant-major with a garden hose; one about 'cleaning fee avoidance' and how tight can you tuck in your shirt...
::sniff:: thanks, Jim. :)
Good times, good times.
ReplyDeleteAh, seasickness. And that is why I joined the Air Force. Because I don't get airsick, but I do get seasick.
ReplyDeleteWell, the guy who puked on the XO was seasick, but he had help.
ReplyDeleteSee, he did get chronically seasick, but he wore a patch (Dramamine), and was ok most of the time. Except on this particular day, somebody, and I'm not saying who, smeared sardines in mustard sauce on the inside of his gas mask. During the GQ, we went to Circle William (gas drills) and donned masks. His eyes got big a saucers, he ripped the mask off, clutched his mouth, and ran for the head - breaking Zebra (water tight integrity) by opening the door in the process. Breaking Zebra is a major bad. The XO happened to be in the passageway and our boy ran right into him. XO started dressing him down, and ulp BARF! right down the front of the XO. Classic. We don't have cable at sea, entertainment is where you find it.
The other guy? That wasn't seasickness, that was too much liberty the night before.
ERIC!!!
ReplyDeleteYouareinsomuchtroubleforgivingmethatfuckingearearworm!!!
WendyB_09
PS- remember boys, you don't have to have 'em to act like you do!!
Just sayin'.